Over the years, especially these past six months, I’ve encountered almost every type of customer or client there is. If you’re reading this, maybe it’s your lucky day—because I don’t post blogs often! Honestly, I’m just tired of TikTok and other video content, so it feels really refreshing to write something funny for once. And hey, if we’ve worked together before, please don’t take this personally—I’m quirky and autistic 😛
So here are a few clients that I’ve came across in funny haha way.
1. The Angel
- Sends 2 clear photos
- Asks politely
- Says “I trust your style!”
- Cries happy tears at delivery
- Leaves a glowing review
Favorite species: Every artist’s dream
2. The Over-Explainer
- Sends 24 photos from every possible angle
- Writes essays about the cat’s personality
- “Just in case” info about their cousin’s guinea pig too
Favorite phrase: “Just one more thing…”
3. The Ghost
- Disappears after you deliver the sketch
- Comes back 2 months later with 7 edits
- “Sorry I was busy!”
Favorite platform: All of them. At once
4. The Control Freak
- Sends blurry photo
- Demands hyper-accuracy
- “Can you make her look like she feels guilty but also proud?”
- Points out microscopic fur mistakes
Favorite pose: The one that doesn’t exist
5. The Bargain Hunter
- “How much for 3 cats and a unicorn on a tote bag?”
- Needs to check with their dog
- Will save for 6 months, maybe
Favorite emoji: Sad face followed by heart
6. The “Art Director”
- Doesn’t know what they want, but knows it’s not what you drew
- Wants a different flower, different background, different vibe
- Still somehow says “I love your style though!!”
Favorite phrase: “Can you just tweak…”
7. The Secret Admirer
- Buys one thing
- Comes back for 7 more
- Doesn’t message, just quietly supports
Favorite action: Silent loyalty
8. The Time Traveler
- Project? Finished. Book? Printed. Timeline? Gone.
- Pops up four months later asking, “Are the illustrations done?”
- Thinks your job continues forever, like a subscription
- Wants new edits… after the contract, the invoice, and the sanity have all been closed
Favorite question: “Can you just…” (again)
9. The Hyperrealist Seeker
- Sees your dreamy flower-cat world and goes, “Can you do a hyper-realistic oil painting of my baby nephew riding a horse?”
- Ignores your entire portfolio
- Might think “style” is something you choose like a filter
Favorite line: “You’re so talented, so you can probably do anything, right?”
10. The Future Millionaire
- “I can’t pay you now, but I will when my business takes off!”
- Always has a huge vision, but can’t afford €15 today
- Thinks “exposure” is a valid currency
Favorite promise: “This is gonna be big!”
11. The Window Shopper Forever
- “Do you sell these?” “Can I buy this?”
- You say yes. You send the link. You never hear from them again
- Possibly a bot? Possibly a ghost? Possibly your cousin?
Favorite move: Asking for your Etsy link… five times
12. The Design Consultant Who Didn’t Hire You
- “Love your art!” (But…)
- Sends ten paragraphs of unsolicited feedback
- Wants changes before purchasing anything
Favorite red flag: “Have you considered changing the entire concept?”
no illustrations this time